Way back when the reality of quarantine set in, anxiety also set in for many of us. Hey, I wasn’t immune to it, either. Who knew that we’d be contemplating mortality so soon? and in this strange way?
Maybe for you things have eased up but loved ones who are still home-bound due to underlying conditions or even age might still feel anxious. It’s hard to know how to help.
This seems like a good time to remind everyone that back in mid-March, I made all of my online anxiety-management and healing tools absolutely free. No strings--no one gets added to a mailing list. Just free. If you’d like to help, simply make sure they download or sign up for these:
Downloadable audio to manage anxiety – FREE
This 24-minute guided imagery for managing anxiety has helped many calm their fears–and is also helpful against insomnia. FREE to download right here. See download instructions in your confirmation email.
Use earbuds and listen while in a chair or bed. Do not use while driving or doing anything else. Like operating machinery.
Daily thoughts/mantras for good health / peace of mind – FREE
Research shows positive thinking can boost our immunity and help manage anxiety. Your free online subscription gives you an email a day for 35 days, each with a positive meditation thought for health or peace of mind.
Save them all– and when you’re done, simply start again. Free, no checkout code needed. Sign up here.
Healing affirmations are now FREE online
Hopeful, helpful healing affirmations for those coping with a disease or chronic condition are now available free as an online subscription.
An email a day for 50 days arrives in your Inbox, each with a healing thought. These are particularly helpful if you are in treatment or dealing with any kind of health challenge. Completely free (no checkout code needed)…just sign up here.
I’m happy to make these powerful healing tools available to all absolutely free. Please share this as you see fit. Also, a few other things that could be of interest:
See all candle options here–one for every need.
Pretty candles with soothing scents might also help. Perfect for taking a break, meditating or prayer.
See all my gorgeous candles with flowers and healing crystals right here.
One more thing: if you or anyone you know would like to receive my several times a week inspiring and thoughtful posts (now mostly about ways to cope with our new world), sign up on the home page. Just scroll down to GET NOTIFIED.
Let it hurt.
Let it bleed.
Let it heal.
And let it go.
Is there anything more painful than family wounds? I don’t think there is and I speak from experience.
That pain is much like grief. Heck, it IS grief, isn’t it? It’s the death of how we hoped our family would be. Our dreams.
Speaking from experience I can say with confidence that wounds inflicted by family — within the family — do not have to drive us in any way.They can pass over us without long-term impact, as long as we’re willing to do the work.
This is the very best advice I’ve ever seen:
Let it hurt.
Let it bleed.
Let it heal.
And let it go.
Massage the wound. Feel through the pain. Don’t be afraid to let it out, all of it. Cry, scream, wail and gnash your teeth if it helps.
And then, in time, it will begin to heal.
You’ll see that you no longer need that wound. It’s lost its power over your life.
And once it is healed, let it go.
This is entirely possible. I know because I did it.
You can, too.
A longtime friend was recounting how, despite serious back problems (very serious), they injured themselves helping someone move something super-heavy, as in at least a ton.
“Why do you do that?” I asked.
“I’ve always done that,” they said. “They needed help. That’s just how I am.”
“So how’s that working for you?” I asked, thinking about the re-injury.
“Some people would call it perseverance and others, stupidity, I guess,” they replied.
“Well, you know which side of that I come down on,” I said.
A client and I were discussing how during her regression, her subconscious was giving messages with the same obvious theme –perhaps it was suggesting a few specific changes to lighten their life.
“But that’s just how I am,” they responded.
“Does that have to be fixed?” I asked. “Is it not possible to adapt to new input if it made your life easier? Could. you consider a new beginning?”
We hang on to who and how we have always been as if our lives depended on it, even when pain (physical and emotional) begs us to change. Even just a little. “That’s just who I am.” “That’s just how I am.”
Even when the subconscious points out (more than once) that change is called for. Even when the conclusion is inescapable.
Who we are is not fixed.
Every minute we have the chance to do things differently.
Every minute brings the possibility of a new beginning.
Regressions often provide input about how to live a more satisfying life. They can be done perfectly well online and I’ve lowered the cost during this national crisis. If you’d like to learn more, visit my Regression page and set up a call to talk about it.
This blog post sat around for months and then, I began having conversations with a friend about their past. Their wounds went back many years, but were so deep and raw I bled for them. And it was so clear that they’d been wounded by someone who was wounded themselves. Wounded people can perpetuate the cycle of pain.
I know a lot about this because I was also wounded by someone who didn’t realize the extent of his own scars and how they drove his behavior. It was my father. After many years of excellent therapy I forgave him and never held it against him. We had a far better relationship as we both aged than we’d had in the past. I thought I was home-free.
Not so fast….
When you’re wounded so young it drives your adult behavior in ways that can be very difficult to notice, much less change. We operate on auto-pilot most of the time, just living life as it comes up. We don’t see how much those early experiences influence our actions involving all of the important things and people in our lives.
If we’re lucky, we get smart when we’re older. I hit my 60s before I saw that any time someone was nasty or there was negativity in the house I reacted viscerally. I didn’t like it. I mean I REALLY didn’t like it. I could feel my blood pressure rise and I’d get an apprehensive feeling in my stomach.
It’s the imprint
Once I started noticing my reaction, the root cause was obvious. I may have forgiven Dad, but his imprint appeared on so much of my life, for good and bad.
Maybe you’ve also been wounded by someone carrying scars of their own. If it’s a parent, and it most always is, because they influence us when we’re youngest and most impressionable, it’s helpful to see a good therapist. Someone who can help you gain perspective on their behavior.
It’s up to us
But the real work is ours: to identify the ways in which we’ve been imprinted and the way that shows in how we live, love and work. Sometimes, the dysfunction goes on for decades and it’s hard to shake off.
I’m here to tell you that you do not have to give a wounded person power over you. You CAN consciously work to shake it off. You CAN let go of resentment. You CAN feel the pain and release it. And you CAN decide to live a more functional life.
Change is difficult. But it is also possible.
And sometimes, very necessary.
Perhaps a regression could help clarify things. I’d love to talk to you about it! Schedule a call or send me an emai. Read more about regression here.
Today’s message is short and sweet.
Keep the faith, because you cannot know what tomorrow will bring.
Keep the faith. It’s a beautiful meditation for this time and I am hanging on to it.
If you’re thinking about changing direction for life and career, consider one of our intuitive sessions to talk it through.
My default has always been logic. Yeah, not so helpful right now. But in a chanting workshop with Nina Rao the other day, she mentioned advice given by her own guru, whenever Nina would come to her for counsel.
“Don’t think. Do your prayers. Find the answers in your own heart.”
If we’ve lived our entire lives by thinking things through, this can be hard to accept. And challenging. It involves trusting in the Divine. And it involves trusting in our own hearts.
Prayer is simply activating a connection with the Divine…or the divine in ourselves. It can take many forms.
As a young Catholic girl I memorized prayer that had little true meaning to me. As an adult, I read more contemporary prayers written to reflect how we speak today. But at this stage of my life, chanting is my prayer. So is simply talking to the Divine. Or to my own heart. Meditation can be prayer.
It may be counter-intuitive to advise don’t think when faced with a decision. But our hearts are wiser than we might imagine.
And of course, so is the Divine.
Free products to help at this time:
Managing Anxiety Audio bit.ly/2wKWfZA
Powerful Positive Health Mantras bit.ly/2wyaCAI
Online Healing Affirmations bit.ly/2WO9TWt