I know I look like I am ok. Most of the time, anyway. And I am. I’m not usually a depressive. I don’t respond to grey skies with grey moods. I’m pretty happy just about every single day and on that, I’m lucky.
And yet, the loss of my old life (thanks, Covid), the things I did and loved to do, has saddened me. I know just about everyone feels the same way, because life has changed in significant ways for us all. Many of us are grieving.
Then there are hopes and dreams that will never be realized. We all have them. In this life we don’t get everything we want, not by a long shot.
Since we are waiting out this difficult period in our hometown I have come face to face with my own grief and loss. My parents, all my aunts and uncles, and now, those in my generation are beginning to fail. Living so far away it was easier to heal–the void wasn’t hitting me in the face like it does now.
No. I am not always ok.
And yet, I embrace the ability to feel it all–yes, even this hard stuff–as part of the dance of life. It’s ok to be not ok at times. Just so we’re not making a habit of it. Because that is NOT ok.
I know you’ve heard this a million times, but it doesn’t make it any less true: I’ve found that focusing on what I DO have as opposed to what I DO NOT have is a great way to shift my mood.
And talking these things through with trusted friends is also a big help. I am so lucky to have a few trusted and close friends with whom I can share my deepest feelings when I am not ok.
(I am not talking about clinical depression serious enough to require therapy and/or meds.That’s different. Embrace all the help you might need.)
So that’s what I’m thinking about today.
And if you know someone having a tough time perhaps one of our healing or grief gifts can be a help. Find them here.
Your words always bring us closer. I have the same thoughts, I thank you for telling us how you feel and all who have responded do. So keep reaching out. It is a terrible time in so many ways. Sending a hug, Beth
Thanks, Beth. It is, that.
Yes! It’s okay NOT to be okay! Funny how this life’s dance just turned into a twist. Or a polka….
oh now that is a great analogy!
Life is a dance, an apt metaphor. I also find this time very troubling, especially with this scary, sure to be ugly election looming.
It is a terrible time.
I love your posts, but I know better than to think ANYONE is always okay, no matter how much they sound like they’ve got it all figured out!
I know you do, my friend.