A friend who lost her daughter many years ago told me that one of the most painful parts of the loss was how people never said her name.

I get it. Those of us on the outside are afraid to say her name. Afraid that it will hurt the parent or bring back sad memories. Make them remember.

Here’s what true.

Parents who lose children remember.Whether they hear their child’s name or not. Oh, they remember.

By saying the child’s name out loud, we honor that life. Parents what us to call their child by name. Acknowledge the reality of their existence, their place in the family.

If you’re worried about bringing back sad memories, trust me: parents who lose a child have those memories all the time. Nothing you say is going to change that.

So when you speak with a grieving parent, don’t be afraid to call their child by name. Tell them a happy memory you have.  Even ask a kind-hearted question if you want.

And if you’d like to do something supportive for someone who is grieving, check out our grief products.

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