How to move forward after bad things happen

How to move forward after bad things happen

life-path
I write about the meaning of the things that happen for me as much as for you. Because life ain’t no bed of roses. No matter the life path.

How did the song go? “I never promised you a rose garden.” And it’s true. Stuff happens and sometimes bad things happen. And yet, we must proceed. We are meant to proceed.

I know so many people who get this, that everything that happens is part of our life path. They don’t necessarily like it, but they get it.

I also know people who fight it. Who find it hard to stomach that pain, cruelty and injustice are part of our life path, collective or individual.

Where do you stand on this?

And then, how do we proceed if bad things happen? Is it even possible to? If you’ve got something to say about this, I would love to hear it. Thanks.

Why death is the only thing that helps us come to terms with death

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Oh, how I love this man, this soul! Teaching in Maui, Dec. 2018

As if my season of loss wasn’t enough, (four death anniversaries between Thanksgiving and New Year’s), my beloved Baba Ram Dass transitioned on Dec. 22 and my beloved cousin, Sandy, on Dec. 24.

It’s a lot. So many chapters in this life closed as I age. Year after and sometimes day after day.. And so, as usual, I turn to the infinite wisdom of Ram Dass for comfort. He may be gone, but his wisdom lives on:

“How you relate to death is the key spiritual work of aging. And how you see death is a function of how much you identify with that which dies. Egos die. Souls don’t die.

I encourage you to make peace with death, to see it as the culminating event of this adventure called life. Death is not an error; it is not a failure.”

come-to-terms-with-deathAs Baba Ram Dass so aptly pointed out: If we live fully in the present, death is just another moment.

How is it that I feel closer to him in death than I did in life?

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The glass votive in the grief gift is now replaced with an Apache Tear obsidian grief stone.

Ram Dass actively worked with the dying–he often told us how much he loved it. If you’d like to support someone in grief or healing I hope you’ll consider one of these gentle gifts, found right here.

 

Why don’t you try being human?

being-humanIt’s pretty awful when you find yourself doing the exact thing you don’t like others to do: Judging a situation without all of the information.

It’s such a shock to find that we are, in fact, human, despite our best efforts to rise above, to keep to a spiritual path, to let kindness be our guide.

“Judge-y” is not how we like to think of ourselves.

It’s not how I like to think of myself. But it’s a human reaction. All-too. I mean, I should be “woke,”, right? Shouldn’t I?

Ram Dass acknowledged this feeling when he assured us that we should risk being human. That we should appreciate our human-ness without judgment. Let our story unfold without getting too far ahead of ourselves. “Try being human,” he suggests.

But oh, how hard that can be!  So I read and listened to these inspirational words of his today:

“Appreciate your humanity. …I’m Ram Dass and I’ve worked on myself, and I’m supposed to be equanimous, loving, present, clear, compassionate, accepting – often times I get tired, I’m angry, I’m petulant, I’m closed down.

“Now for a long time I’d get into those states and I would feel really embarrassed because that isn’t who Ram Dass is supposed to be. So I would appear like I was warm, charming, equanimous, compassionate and there was deviousness and deception involved.

And then I realized that that is – that’s bad business because that cuts us off from each other. And I had to risk my truth. I had to risk being human with other people. And realize that what we offer each other is our truth. And our truth includes all of our stuff.

And the first thing I had to do was accept my own truth. I had to allow myself to be a human being. And I think I was helped by my disembodied friend, who, when I said to him, ‘Emmanuel what am I doing on earth?’ he said ‘You’re on earth, why don’t you try taking the curriculum? Why don’t you try being human?”

I just love that. Because I’m so guilty of getting “ahead of myself” and not really understanding that I’m still on my path. So yes, being human can be embarrassing. But that’s what we are: human.

We’re right where we are supposed to be.
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Thoughtful, pretty gifts for those who grieve or are fighting a health battle are here.

How you can find the light, be the light & shine it for others

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Be the light.

A friend sent me this message upon the death of Baba Ram Dass and it’s so wise I just had to share with you:

“So, Ram Dass passes on the first night of Hanukkah, reminding us of the Shamash , the “helper or attendant “ the one that is lit for others. His passing reminds us that we too, are called to be the light that first shines for others to see and then helps them to be their own light, and in turn, will shine for others…”

And that is the truth. We are here to find the light…be our own light..and light the path for others so that they, too can be their own light. That is what we are meant to do here.

How can you be the light for others you encounter in this new year?

  • If someone you love is grieving or healing. please consider our beautiful, gentle gifts right here on this site.